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Thursday, December 18, 2008


Being single during the holidays is sometimes sad. There's the stockings hung on the wall.. all grouped together in their little families.. except your lonely little stocking at the bottom all by itself. A house full of people and fun then returning home to complete silence. Defening silence that never seems to go away. Making dinner for one every night. Day-dreaming about a nice guy kissing you under mistletoe. Decorating your tree alone. No date to the office christmas party (again.. third yr running). Watching couples snuggled up in a horse drawn carriage rolling down the street. As if these things don't grate on your emotions enough, you have the constant advice pouring just enough salt in the wounds to make it burn a little more.

It never ceases to amaze me how quick people are to give such advice. The lastest was " you need to get married". Hmmmm... Now why didn't I think of that? As much as I appreciate everyone's care and concern I also dread it. Most people don't realize that on a daily basis (for real) I am given advice about my dating life. Here are some of my favorite examples:
"You should get out more"
"You need to date someone"
" Do one of those house exchanges like on 'The Holiday'.. maybe you will meet a guy"
" Join a theater group"
"Meet someone at church"
"You should have a baby"
OH the list goes on forever. I am also asked why I am (or not) doing these things. I really have no answer for any of you. There is no "magical" way to meet someone. I meet lots of people every day. What people don't get is that it wears on me. More than anyone really knows. Trust me.. I am fully aware of my dating situation. It has been a little over 7 (long) years since my last relationship. There have been prospects but usually one of these excuses comes out:
"Im too busy to date"
"I like you but I don't want to date you"
"we're going in two different directions"
"im too old for you"
"im too young for you"
"i dont date people I work with" etc etc etc...

I by no means feel like my life is horrible just because I am not dating someone. Quite the opposite actually. I have the most incredible family in the world. I am so blessed. I hold my nieces and nephews and I am overflowing with love. Nothing can beat the feeling of a child calling out your name and running to you with open arms. Coffee and pedicures with my sister in laws are priceless moments. Joking around and getting picked on by my brothers is a way of life and i love it. I hope that never stops. My parents will always see me as their little girl eventhough I am grown. I love that. I have a best friend who is a sister, a confidant. Her husband and precious children are family. Sometimes I lose sight of all this. The advice gets me down and makes me dwell and think on what I don't have in my life. I want to be thankful for what I do have every day and be encouraged that God knows the plans he has for me.. for hope and a future.

So I may be single once again this holiday season but I am rich in family and friends. There are great guys out there and one of them will sweep me off my feet one day. Until then I agree with Carrie Underwood's new song: "The Boys I Meet" . Click on the song title and enjoy.


Melissa Ansley said...

Should we add..."Why don't you find someone online?"

"You'll find someone when you least expect it."

"You're too picky. Just go out and have some fun, you don't have to marry every guy you go on a date with."

Carrie said...

Shannon, I love you. I won't offer advice because I have heard it all too. Just know that I do love you! :)